I lost my father almost twelve years ago—on 30th December 2013. It was a time filled with both profound love and unimaginable loss. A year before his passing, I stepped away from my legal career to be with him full-time. Burnout had taken hold of me, yes, but more than that, I knew my time with him was precious and fleeting.
My dad was my hero, my anchor, my teacher, and my best friend. Raised by him alone after my parents split when I was five, he poured everything into giving me the life I have today—including the dream that I would become a lawyer. And yet, when grief knocked on my door, it didn’t quietly ask for entry. It smashed that door down.
I expected life to be hard without him, but I never imagined how truly lost and exposed I would feel. Without my role as his caregiver, daughter, or lawyer, I felt like I was drifting—adrift from identity, from purpose, from the world I thought I knew.
To make sense of the chaos, I started writing blogs—raw, unfiltered reflections on grief’s irrational and non-linear path. Writing became my lifeline on days like Christmas, on his birthday, on mine—days that still stir my soul deeply.
For daughters out there facing their first Christmas without their precious dads, I want you to hear this: you are not alone. Grief is the price we pay for love, as the late Queen Mother once said. It’s not something that cuts away quickly or cleanly.
If you feel like giving up, like the point of moving forward is lost, remember this: connection does not die with death. Your dad is only a thought away. He lives within you—in the memories, in the love, in the quiet moments you least expect.
I don’t look forward to Christmas the way I used to. The carol singing in shops still grates, and the loneliness sometimes feels unbearable. But I keep the Christmas lights on our live tree in the front yard—because that’s what Dad would have wanted.
If you’re seeking light this Christmas, My Dad and Me: A Journey of Love, Loss and Life is a gift from my heart to yours. Maybe it will help you find hope and healing, too.
From my heart to yours, you are seen, you are loved, and you will thrive.
Peace be with you.
©DMP
